Packing Boxes & Big Feelings: How We Helped the Kids Say Goodbye to Our First Home

Moving doesn’t just mean changing addresses. It’s watching your children say goodbye to the only home they’ve ever known. And if you’ve ever had to move with children, you understand it’s not only the packing tape and logistics involved; it’s the emotions put inside each wall, each window, each corner.

 Source: https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-in-white-t-shirt-sitting-on-brown-sofa-chair-4568733/

Let the Little Ones Lead

We didn’t announce anything big. We just talked it out gradually while we had dinner, between mac and cheese bites. The news didn’t exactly roll off so well. The conversation with our oldest included him asking if his stuffed animals had to move, too. Both of our toddlers burst into tears for unclear reasons.

Rather than frantically packing them, we assigned them little tasks: labeling boxes with crayons, wrapping the contents of their toys in kitchen towels, and picking whose storybooks would wait until the last to pack.

Memories in Every Room

Our children didn’t notice the furniture and walls. They noticed the spot where they’d taken their first steps, where there remained specks of last year’s birthday party’s sparkle on the carpet, where they’d confided secrets to the dog behind the stairs.

We provided space for all those emotions. We strolled through each of the rooms and spoke of our favorite memories, such as the kitchen being converted to a dance floor and the hallway being the track for laundry basket rides. It allowed them to link the dots between their memories and their feelings. The tears came, but so did the laughter.

Building ‘Lasts’ That Are Experienced As Love

Rather than dwelling on what we were going to lose, we concentrated on making our “lasts” the best they possibly could be. We had movie nights on the floor with popcorn served in mixing bowls. We bedded down to sleep in the living room in sleeping bags. On the last day, we left behind little notes for the next family to discover, including ridiculous drawings, sweet messages, and the occasional secret joke.

It wasn’t an attempt to pretend everything was okay. It was to bear the emotional burden and enable our children to stay safe through it.

The Grown-Up Stuff That Occurs Behind the Scenes

Of course, amidst all this, there was the paperwork. The signings, the coordinating, and the phone calls that inevitably ring through nap time. Between the chaos of packing and reassuring our children, we made certain all the required paperwork was taken care of, using trustworthy real estate title and deed services to smooth our transition. It allowed us to worry less, so we could tend to the things that meant the most to us: our children’s hearts.

Moving Forward, Together

Our new house remains cluttered with boxes, and no one can quite recall where the toothbrushes are. There’s already a picture taped to the fridge and an attempt at a fort going on in the living room, though. The children still mention the old house now and then, and it’s alright.

Moving is not only about what we bring along. It’s also about what we carry with us inside and the ways we create space for our children to do the same.